Dadaji then posed the questions,
"What is man? What is woman? What is marriage?
"Is man, he? Is woman, she? No, that
is not correct. Each of us has been created both he and she. In fact all is She.
The Universe is the feminine) giving birth to all God's creation. God is She.
"Why this need for superstition and
separation based on gender? All are the same, no one better than the other. No
one seems to understand the Bhavagad Gita when it speaks of prakriti and
purush. Prakriti is the mind, or manifest world of action and reaction. This is
the female aspect. Purush is the spirit which is constant, and is higher and
more reliable. This has nothing to do with man and woman. "Man has
purposely mistranslated this, saying women are of a lesser nature than man.
Therefore, women should not be given scholarly or religious training or
positions in educational, political, business, or religious institutions. This
is all false, and is finally starting to fall away.
"In life experience we see some
women, who behave very much like men, or men like
women. This is because one polarity is
greater than the other. "I speak of the true kundalini, or tantra. When
the lower nature and the higher nature awaken to one another and embrace and
greet one another, then we have marriage, merger, union, or yoga.
"When the words of the mouth become
the meditation of the heart, when the Divine
Name has risen to embrace and fill the
mind, the true marriage vow has been taken with the Almighty. Confusion fades,
mind and heart do not argue. This is Brindavanlila. When the man and woman in
you, Adam and Eve or Krishna and Radha, are at peace with one another, they
cease to exist and become One residing in the Garden of Eden.
"What I am saying is that first there
should be Divine union or marriage. God is your husband, your wife, your lover.
Then you can have a worldly mate and share
this communion of man and woman in God.
"A person cannot truly love another
person. The mind attached to the body automatically develops self - interest,
attractions, and distractions. From these arise restlessness, boredom, anger,
frustration, depression and differences. Until you are yoked with God, who
resides within as the holder of the body and the mind, until then, you cannot
relish the taste of constant bliss.
"God is moved by our constant
repetition of Name. With God's touch only, can your worldly relationships
survive and thrive in Love. "Sadhus, yogis, and monks want to
attain this state by denying their senses,
by efforts, rituals, meditations, and austerities. They can never feel God's
Love in a real joyful state or convey that to another.
"We only experience constant bliss by
the natural process of living. Even the ones who renounce worldly and bodily
pleasure and try to experience bliss by austerities, achieve only a dry,
tasteless superstition and counterfeit experience." You who have met
Dadaji, see a natural love in a worldly atmosphere. At once those who are
ready, can be opened by His touch, and will experience bliss. He is the
example. As a family man, a householder, he shows us that this is thenatural
way, the way God desires for us.
Dadaji left home at an early age and
wandered in the jungles, forests, and mountains. He found many so called yogis,
who were one hundred, one hundred and fifty, two hundred years old, sitting and
trying to realize God. Dadaji told them that their God given bodies were of no
use, to give them up. He said they should be reborn as householders and live in
Delhi, then they would experience
something of God.
"Only with this life itself, with
these appetites and desires that came with us at the time of birth, can we
realize God. We must learn to discriminate and feed them moderately along with
remembering God constantly."
GOD'S SECRET MUSIC, FRAGRANCE, TO FOLLOW
ARE WITHIN YOUR HEART.
When the love of man or woman is for the
spirit within each other, it is beautiful. It is not of the mind, which is ever
fluctuating. In Dadaji's Love there is no distinction between man and woman. He
is within All as life itself.
What I speak of is a blissful life. Boudi,
Dadaji's wife, is simple like a child. She is full of love within, for all
around her. She is beyond theafflictions of wants and demands. This
beauty of her being cannot be understood
unless one is deeply and inwardly in tune with her. Who does a man or a woman
love? By love, I do not mean just physical attraction, or getting one's
interests filled. Love which transcends these interests always leads to
benevolent thoughts. /When one person loves anotherfrom their heart,
unselfishly, he or she stands against all odds to see that their beloved is not
harmed in any way. If one can love another person this way, it manifests God's
Love and the fulfillment of the purpose of their birth. This is Truth.
If not this love, all a person has are
worthless entanglements. Marriage becomes a business, and one has to protect
their financial interests as worldly wealth is amassed in banks. Arrangements
are agreed upon at marriage, already in anticipation of divorce. These are
arrangements of the mind and senses and can never truly be of the heart.
On e w h o can 1o v e silently by their
actions, does not even need to let their beloved know it. They can remain
silent and still the love is conveyed. This silent love is penance and devotion
itself.
If Love is demanded by another and must
constantly be affirmed, it becomes no longer genuine, loses its integrity, and
becomes affected. Yet, when two become this is the greatest it is " God's
Love One in God's Name, Love of all, for manifesting within other. and without
for each "We must first find God in order to find ourselves. 0nly after we
know God, and know ourselves can we find, know, and love another. D adaji has
not co me like the worldly Gurus to tell you who He is. He has come to tell and
remind you who you are.
"Eventually, all become fed up with
birth after birth of entanglements, confusions of the mind, and the blows and
counterblows of life. You then seek God. 'Save me!' you say. 'Oh, God, save
me!' Path and goal are the same in the final analysis.
Dadaji cannot tell you to stay with a wife
or husband or to leave them. If there is enough love of God and one another,
enough feeling of responsibility or duty, you will stay. And it is best to
stay, you can do nothing but stay, for you have been chosen of the One, and
there is no question of choice or alienation.
"If you do not feel enough love, to
stay with your husband or wife, after you have already left them intellectually,
spiritually, and emotionally, to stay will cause poison. There is no doubt that
this was a marriage of minds and bodies for the purpose of convenience, and was
never founded in God's Love. It is not that things have changed, that two
people have turned away from love, it is that love never actually existed.
WHEN YOU REMEMBER GOD, THE LIVES OF THOSE
AROUND YOU WILL BE ENRICHED AND MORE JOYFUL.
I am speaking to you of a love that is
both personal and impersonal at the same time. It is the love and gratitude a
mother feels for her child, if she is truly unselfish and loving. Yes, she may
become tired at times, but she always loves. The child may leave, but she
always loves. So it is with God's Love.
If we can love one another with even a
fraction of God's Love, it will truly be Divine.
In this Divine Love, we can never turn
from one another in hate. We will love, even as Jesus did upon being nailed to
a cross.
"Many people come and tell me about
problems, about ailments, about 'incurable' situations, and ask for a miracle.
The only miracle Dadaji can prescribe is not from this body, but from
God. When you ignore the problems, when
you ignore yourself, when you repeat God's Name, then you will have forgotten
to give food to the problems. They will shrivel up and die. You will call this
a miracle, for the 'incurable' was cured.
If you can chant God's Name amid st the
distractions, confusions, incompatible, and 'incurable' situations of life,
this is truly being 'saintly.' This chanting must be done silently. Sometimes
it is possible, sometimes it is difficult or impossible.
When the change occurs in you, by the
Grace of God, and it manifests outwardly, those around you who are threatened
may exert pressure on you to drop this way. The pressure they exert only widens
the growing separation. "Families that are happy seem not to be happy
because of things of pleasure, or of intellectually common ground, but because
they see God within one another. They accept that the main purpose of this life
is not to give things, but to taste and share God's Love. Then a:ll things are
provided. When it is time to part physically, there is nothing to worry about,
no mourning, as it is all God's Love and Will.
"Unhappy families live in fear. Fear
of the known and fear of the unknown. They are bound together not by the
adhesive of God's Love, but by the imprisoning and possessive idea that another
person's behavior is the determining factor of their own happiness or
unhappiness. Only with God's Love can they survive. When a man knows his female
nature, and a woman knows her male nature, and when neither one feels
threatened or used, harmony exists between them."
Today there is the question of
homosexuality, or 'gay' relationships. Sometimes, due to an unnatural and
extremely difficult situation, often not in conscious memory, a person makes an
unconscious, natural adjustment to the situation by an intensification of
either their m ale or female polarity Later, when two people of the same
sex, who have complementary female-male polarities meet, they experience a
counterfeit relationship.
Upon meeting Dadaji, upon being touched by
God's Grace, and upon the rememberance of Mahanam, their God-given natural
balance of male-female polarities is gently restored. All areas of a person's
life are thus realigned and balanced in the Light of Truth.
Dadaji can tell you many things, like
Divine Love is not fear, not dependence, or jealousy. It is not possessiveness,
domination or self-pity. By God's Grace, and by remembering God's Name, all
these can be gently washed away. A natural feeling of duty and responsibility
replaces them, and you will have a happy and beautiful life together.
When you are blissful within yourself, when
the male and female within are One, when they are getting along, with no
arguments, you are in tune with God. When two of you share your bodies in this
same state of bliss, this is sharing God's Love as One.
It is so important, in a man and woman
relationship, that you be open and honest.
Two in communion with God, always have an
alter to go and to kneel before together.
Especially, when the whirlwind of your
minds and emotions meet in confusion and
conflict. Do not try to put one another in
a cage, confined by possession and jealousy. You cannot by your actions bind
another to you. Just as you cannot by your actions bind God to you Together you
are bound in the freedom of God's Love.
"When two people, who are destined to
live in communion with God as One, encounter difficulties in their life
together, it is not possible for one or both to run away, saying, 'I can live
without you.' Is it possible for you to run away from God? As you each remember
God's Name, God gently guides you together again in Love and communion. You love
one another as people who love and devoted to God.
As God responds to loving looks, thoughts,
and words, so your words, 'I love you,' spoken aloud, in gesture, and actions,
will be as nourishment to the Soul of one another. This Divine Love is
practiced with one another; we cannot get it or demand it from each other.
To be 'in love' with each other, in God,
is to love the adventure of life. It is to accept each situation whatever the
Condition, not searching for a 'safe' Haven or 'security' But, instead venturing
out into the world with no fear, knowing the Comforter always walks before you.
There is the possibility of true, permanent
human love. But, it can never come from the point of asking, 'What is in it for
me?' It is easy to see the abundance of selfishness around you. Many people
saying, 'Grab all you· can, you only live once.' So many seminars on self fulfillment,
self-satisfaction, self improvement, and self-realization, all are really based
on selfishness.
True, permanent human love, not based in
your mind or on your selfishness, is impossible without acceptance of responsibility.
Human love as the manifestation of God's Divine Love is not possible without
commitment. In our love for God, we are committed to remember, and to stay with
God even when things get rough, or when what seems to be a better God comes
along.
"So it is with a human, divinely inspired,
love relationship. It is possible only with a commitment that no matter what
situation comes, no matter what fascination
presents itself, you are both committed to remember and stay with one another,
as you are both committed to God. This constant and consistent human love for
one another is one of caring and sharing today and tomorrow, and all the tomorrows
to come.
UNION OF MAN AND WOMAN EXPRESSED IN
MARRIAGE, IS THEIR COMMITMENT OF TWO AS ONE IN COMMUNION WITH GOD.
"If your commitment is only mentally and
physically oriented, it is more of an entanglement that cannot survive. This human
love that I speak about can happen in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, as
you commit yourselves to one another in
God.
"Your commitment to one another requires
that you be discriminating. You will not just experience everything and anyone
who comes along. But, you will view each situation in light of your commitment
to one another, considering whether it promotes, honors, and reaffirms that
commitment. Otherwise there will be an internal chaos. You must be true to one
another's happiness and well-being.
If you have a 'lover,' you will be as a divided
city that must fall. "Some choices will be made, therefore, which will
then deepen your experience of human relationship. Some things you may have
wanted to do will become impossible, as they are given up in place of the Divine
communion of two people in one. This profound commitment and intimacy blossoms
forth as bliss and joy beyond words
Sometimes we spend our lives as if we are
sitting in a tree laden with fruit.
We are not able to choose which to eat, we
try to figure out who to be, whom to be
With, what to do, and where to go. The fruit
is all around us, yet we are starving to death, never making a commitment to
ourselves, another person, or to God.
"What a big difference there is in having
a good time, and having a good life. You must accept that tensions and conflicts,
born of the mind, will be present at times. But, you can no longer ask, 'What
am I getting out of this?' Rather you will ask, 'What am I putting into this?'
Teach one another gently of each other strengths
and weaknesses. Remembering God
together, you will then share the joys of living
and laughing and loving. Only when
you forget God, do the anger and frustrations
appear. When these situations occur, you can stay or walk away, but most important
is not reacting and acting with anger or cruelty. If these linger, the relationship
will be affected. The only saving Grace at anytime, any place, with any person
or situation, is to take God's Name."
TAKING NAME IS THE EASIEST WAY TO LOVE ONE
ANOTHER AND TO LOVE GOD.
Once a man named Fritz Perls wrote a quotation,
that wound up on many posters
and was widely quoted: "I do my
thing. You do your thing. I am not in this world
to live up to your expectations, nor you to
live up to mine. You are you, and I am
I. If by chance we find each other, it is beautiful.
If not, it can't be helped."
I know Perls meant well, but he totally missed
the point of love. How can I do my thing without affecting you? And, how can you
do your thing without affecting me? We are interrelated to one another.
In your search for happiness in a worldly
marriage, you must give up your ego's demand for independence. Instead practice
inner-dependence and interdependence. Two must join as One, to complement, not
oppose each other. Caring and warmth shared with one another are so essential
to loving. I cannot do my thing, and you do your thing, that only creates a
separation.
Union of man and woman in God destroys all
separation. Each person is unique and
special, together each is complemented.
You find each other not by luck, or coincidence.
It is by God's Will and Love you reach out to one another.
If you are destined to be together as man
and woman in a marriage born of
communion with God, it cannot be undone.
Your only responsibility is whether you will
make a joy or a joke of it."
There is a very pointed story about the difference
between Divine Love and human love. Once upon a time, a young man fell in love
with the fairest maiden in the land. She had many suitors and told him that she
wanted proof of his great love for her. He was told to slay his mother and
bring her heart as proof of his love.
He performed the act and while running towards
his beloved, holding the heart inhis hand, he tripped and fell down. The heart
rolled a little distance on the ground, and he heard a whisper come from it,
asking, "Did you hurt yourself, my son?" So it is with God. You can
claim God dead, non-existent. God still loves you.
The highest goal in human life is as Jesus
said, 'to love one another as I have loved you.' The highest goal in human relationships
is to love each other as God
loves each of us."
WHEN TWO BECOME ONE IN GOD'S NAME.
THIS IS THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL.
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